i may or may not be watching the land before time
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
I'm pretty sure that when my parents bought me those savings bonds they thought it would go towards something useful like tuition. Not your bail.
I told you I'd buy you lunch.
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
Came so hard my ears popped. This lovely piece of news and pissin in my driveway brought to you by rum
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
Fuck me I smell like cheese
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
Randomize
