did you get my message about your dog?
no... is he ok?
no, i didn't see him when i was being chased out of your house. check your drive way :( sry
the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
You got ahold of his prescription papers and gave out prescriptions for cranberry and vodka
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
Randomize
