i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
They didn't have a "sorry I was late for your birthday party because I was getting arrested" card.
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
He followed me on twitter after I posted a drunk screen shot of a tweet. It's like he gave me permission to stalk him on a whole different level.
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
He asked me to describe my life outside work. I responded with "Home-wrecker.
Randomize
