I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
I know we had a good night last night because his turtle was half asleep chewing on the used condom.
Just puked in the monkey exhibit at the zoo. They ate it. I don't want a pet monkey anymore.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
pretty sure 5 days for a bachelor party in Vegas is too long when even the stripper giving me a lapdance says "wow that's a long time!"
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
Such a big mess for such a small penis
Randomize
