:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
They woke me up at 4 in the morning screaming "drunk adventure time!" because they needed a sober chaperone. They made me walk them around the block shoeless.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
Randomize
