I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
Don't ask but i need a priest, a calzone, a litre of gravy, and exactly 7 oreos
And a bag of nachos
Randomize
