Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
I JUST WATCHED PAULA DEEN PUT BUTTER IN HER BLOODY MARY. This is not a drill. Real life.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
I legitimately just had to leave work because I am too hungover. The front office ladies keep making fun of me.
Randomize
