So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
I love you and want you to know that you're the best friend ever and me lassoing you with a seatbelt was out of sheer affection.
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
Randomize
