Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
birth control should be required to get into college
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
I'm sitting in my bathroom sink, eating a tuna sandwich. He had better weed than I expected.
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?!
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
Randomize
