Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
$5 long island pitchers = roommate pissing on his laptop at 3am.
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
When you're high, you dance like an injured velociraptor.
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
Randomize
