the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
We must be getting old. All of our friends are having kids and they aren't illegitimate.
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
Randomize
