if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
I have "if found please return to" written in sharpie on my arm, my uterus is rejecting everything, and I have hickies. I must actually be an 18 year old piece of shit girl instead of a responsible 23 year old
She came home, put on the news, left a 20 minute drunk message on her friends machine, then proceeded to play back the entire message laughing hysterically and then just passed out
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
Randomize
