I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
Life is so much better after having sex.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
Gotta say, self-deprecating Lord of the Rings-themed sex jokes were not on my agenda for today.
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
Randomize
