If I sit on the seam of my jeans just the right way when the bass hits, this might be my new favorite band.
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
the night ended with taco bell and tears
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
Do you think it's a bad sign of the outcome of the pregnancy test I'm about to take that I was eating a fudgsicle on the way into the drugstore? Would it make worse to tell you I also bought a big ass bag of Cornnuts?
Randomize
