you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
He told me the hickey on the side if his neck was actually a "bruise" from hitting a bird on his motorcycle. I'm not sure what's more impressive, the fact people believed him due to the size of the mark or the fact you gave it to him.
If I die tonight, I want you to have the rest of my nachos. And my porn collection.
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
Did my roommate wake up in your girlfriend's apartment in drag again?
Randomize
