never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
it hurts more in the daytime
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
Too lazy to make dinner. Had chocolate and scotch instead. Check in with me in a half hour.
I'm going to text my booty call and tell him nevermind, that I got the job finished by myself. That will teach him to text back faster.
This lesson is brought you by a psychology class.
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
Blow job season was short but glorious.
Randomize