Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
Randomize
