He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
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