Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
She wasnt impressed wen i brought a guy for her back with me, a 3am impromptu sperm donor is not a gd birthday present. Im a bad gf.
Just successfully made home fries from potatoes we used as bowls while stoned as shit. I deserve a trophy.
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
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