Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
Is it awkward to ask someone I've slept with to officiate my wedding?
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
No it's ok. I made friends with the guy that always wears helmets to the bar. His name is helmet Harry
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
I just want nice things and good sex
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
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