OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
Randomize
