shes about as inviting as chlamydia
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
it glows. i had to have it.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
Randomize
