drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
Threesome in a minivan. New low
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
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