i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
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