sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
On the bright side I got 500 American Express points paying for the abortion
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
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