You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
I wish he’d realize all I want is dick. He’s my boytoy. He’s a stunt cock. \n\nCome over, fuck me silly, eat some leftovers, fuck me again, then go back to the frat house
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