at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
theres no point in washing my sheets anymore. its always going to be a fine layer of booze and semen.
I woke up and she had washed, dried, folded my clothes, cooked me breakfast, and had started cleaning my room
haha, you sure you didnt fuck your mom?
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
cat food counts as protein by the way
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
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