It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
I don't have any swimsuits that don't show off the weird handprint bruises on my hips. Do you have a onepiece I can borrow?
Best part: she drunkenly told me I'm dangerous then slurred to my parents that I should watch out in case I fall in love with her. Then she mounted a pinata
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
When I wake up, please remind me why my shoe is in the toilet, my shower is filled with jello, and there is a naked girl sleeping on my coffee table holding a bag of Cheetos. that is all.
Apparently asking your girlfriends roommate for a hand job when u craw into the wrong bed after a bottle of rum is "bad form".
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
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