I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
holy shit! you were walking down a hill and just happened to be passing a trash can like 4 ft away and projectile vomited over a fence into the trash can. kept walking and drank a beer.
Randomize
