Hey man sorry I got all grabby
How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
Banged a lazy eyed chick last night. It was like fucking an iguana.
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
Randomize
