i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
I was so drunk that I didn't realize he was staying at the Waldorf. I walk of shamed the Astoria, do you even know what this means?
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
Someone just told me I could double date with them and their dog as my date. This is why the suicide rates are so high at the holidays.
He will. He has no choice. What's he gonna do? Find a better fuck buddy? We both know that's not possible. I'm the ideal friend with benefit. Minus snoring and uneven tits.
You know how I said I'd never worry about my roommate? Well I just walked in on her masturbating to Star Trek.
Did she boldly cum where no one has cum before?
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
His cat just sat there and simultaneously bobbed his head up and down while I blew him
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