All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
The magic cards should have been the first clue. The comments that I have "amazing birthing hips" and that I'm "beautiful in a child bearing sort of way just sealed his fate.
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
"Fuck all you guys I'm going to be Cameltoe Spider-Man for Halloween."
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
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