Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
I just feng shui'd our living room furniture. You may be mad in the morning
woke up naked, spooning with wine bottle.. and my video chat was still open. fuck, not again.
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Randomize
