she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
The chick I went home with last night had a happy trail
im watching shaqs comedy special. this is how i know im not sober.
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
Never underestimate the power of titties
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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