I should have bought two bottles, she left before I could feel her tits...
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
I transported a midget tonight. He got beat up by another, midgetier midget. Is it bad that this is what makes me feel compassion after 15 years of being a paramedic?
Midgetier?
Smaller, yet meaner.
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
Randomize
