atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
My hand is eating my burrito and not saving any for my mouth. TRIPPPPPPPPPPPPPPINN!
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
In other news, just had to pluck an ingrown pub with the pliers from my multi tool while sitting on the toilet at work.
I sent her a video on Snapchat of me cumming, with a Father's Day snap filter that said "#1 Dad".
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
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