Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
I'm pretty sure I have jizz on the back of the dress I wore to church. Awesome.
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
Do you think they make a "sorry in my drunken debauchery I dropped a pumpkin off the balcony and you happened to be standing right there/get well soon" card?
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
Do you have any puffy paint? I want to put "fiesta muthafuckas" on my sombrero but its too much to bedazzle.
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
Randomize
