I will die if light touches me.
Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
She said her name was "party"
how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
I woke up with my keys safelty pinned to my thong. It's gonna be a great day.
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
Randomize
