Duck Duck Cougar?
You owe me a new pair of headphones. You plugged mine into the top of a mustard bottle.
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
I bet you my entire life savings of $0 that there's a Doctor Who porn parody and that it features the sonic screwdriver being inserted into some cavities
I just folded my laundry and I washed 3 pairs of underwear and 6 jizz towels. Clearly I'm quarantining right.
Randomize
