so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
Just got complimented on my chugging... Car bombs show how good I am at swallowing, they should be my new pickup line.
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
Jen gave my number to some guy she met in NY. He sent me a picture of his weiner. He had nice shoes. I replied with a pic of bacon.
When in doubt always reply with bacon.
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
I knocked over his glass and he yelled "Oh no the boxed wine!" and slurped it off the coffee table. Then he showed me how to mix maple syrup, Jameson, and coffee. My family is better than your family.
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
Randomize
