Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
I'm way too drunk on a Sunday to handle this level of Jesus.
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
Randomize
