I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
Hurry up and get here. I already announced to the bar that you were on a mission to get laid tonight. I have 3 takers.
I may or may not be taking a bath listening to the Phantom of the Opera. This lovely moment brought to you by xanax.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
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