Todays lesson: Chew your food better when your drunk. I almost choked throwing up this morning.
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
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