At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
nothin like your phone freezing up and sending out old booty calls at 11am on a sunday. fml.
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
On the way out the door to work grabbed the wine glass on the floor left for the ghost of Elijah and chugged it. PASSOVER.
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
Um. Did you take a picture of me with a giant dildo after we went bowling?
he said "I would have fucked you in the chipotle bathroom" and I can't get over how awesome that would've been
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
Randomize
