I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
apparently it isn't appropriate to tell a coworker who is eating celery because it's "negative calories" that a blowjob is too
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
I am wearing two different shoes and just swallowed my gum. Wake the fuck up and bang the bartender already.
Rolled in at 3:30am from the strip club, with all the screaming I did, Siri doesn't even recognize my voice this morning,
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
Randomize
