My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
a woman just threw her tv out the window while screaming "will you fucking work now?". i'm never moving
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
I want you to know I am at work super hungover and I threw up in the mop sink. I feel like you will appreciate this
You're my fucking hero
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
I'm literally about to create a tinder account. Just so someone drives me to get food.
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize
