he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
Like there's an 87% chance I'll end up on the bedroom floor demanding sex while freestyling in your face. I'm going to buy rum.
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
I just called my grandma crying, apologizing for being the first grandchild to have premarital sex...I'm either about to start my period or pregnant.
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
Randomize
