I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
I woke up on the steps beside a plate of spaghetti and a toilet paper roll ripped in half. And i actually think this day is gonna get better.
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
my liver is dry heaving
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
Randomize
