Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
I have got to stop assigning last names to girls I get numbers from based on what I think will remind me of them... Sarah Petrydish is not an acceptable memory trigger
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
I can't turn off my feet"
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
Swear to god, somebody just drove by with mickey mouse in their passenger seat and he waved at me.
Randomize
