Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
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