But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
17 year olds will be the death of me.
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
Randomize
