I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
I just had a dude tell me how he got fired from friendly's for tripping a kid and followed the story with "If i'm gonna do it, I do it big."
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
Randomize
